It has been a wonderful near 7 months in this new job of mine. Several commendations so far from customers and clients. But I cant seem to shake off the feeling that something is still missing.
I am enjoying my blocks of being alone in Langkawi when I Mom returns to KL. I get to just relax and chill and not have to give a care about what others want and wish. Quite liberating really. But there are many things I am missing.
My friends for one, from school and MH. Some of which I have formed such close bonds. I think I can still hang on here in Langkawi but I not too sure how long I can take it. Moments of quiet can seem way too quiet at times.
Loneliness, would be a wrong label to apply here. More of a nagging there could be more out there kinda thing. What does it really mean to be free really? I have always wondered.
Away from family, friends, to just be me. I would probably lose my head very quickly if at all. So why does something that feels so right - earning better pay, doing something new, making new friends, feel so lackluster?
Years ago, I lamented that I felt like too little butter spread over too much bread. Now I feel like there isn't any more butter to go around. Could it be I am missing her so badly?
No comments:
Post a Comment